a passing away...

Kelly's grandma passed away tonight...wow what a way to start a post! Sorry about that but hey with my mom in the hospital getting ready to have surgery on her back, camp with 390 some odd people in a few days (we start on sunday), and the real possibility of Kelly not being at camp because she needs to help my parents at home...cause mom is having surgery. I guess I could say thank God that He is in control!

ohh yeah we do thank you for your prayers of strength and healing, strength for our families and us as we walk thru another death, and healing for my mom!

I know its short...not funny...not aww forget it I am tired and all I care to know is God is in control!

really thankful for an understanding wife

Today has been a really busy day...man it started early 5:00 came a call from mom (mom and dad live downstairs) and she needed help. So the day started off with a run down to the hospital and I ended up spending most of the day there with her.

She is doing okay but gets to spend the night in the hospital...but all is good with her! So where does the beautiful wife fall into all this? She takes the kids and my dad and runs with the day and here it is:
- makes dad his lunch cause he will be staying at home.
- makes 3 kids there breakfast and gets them out the door to church to make sure 2 Jr High Youth Services get up and running.
- then part way thru the day gets the news her grandma is not doing well and is on her way home.
- calls me cries her eyes out and then picks herself up and finishes the last service.
- goes and sees her grandma then picks up the 2 boys from being watched and heads home

This woman amazes me...cause then she goes to the supermarket and pick up some food. Steaks for us and hotdogs for the boys (chayse is at wessies and natos...thanks guys) and man that steak was good!

Thank you God for what you have blessed me with...

He said it...and I can relate.

Los put up a post about something that is really close to my heart...where I work. I grew up in a small church in Arkansas (nothing against it at all) who had a big vision and a small force to get it done. Where as now I am at a mega church that has a big vision and a large force to get it done.

So before I dig any further I will let him say it cause he did a better job...Los.

Give it a read and remember we are all on the same team!

Fred

Off the Reservation...

Man it has been a while since a post...a week ago Tuesday we moved into a new house in St. Michael and have been busy ever since unpacking and organizing and we are still not done! So thus the reason for the "drought" of info but I am back!

Got to run down to Dulonos Pizza in uptown for the bike night and WOW was there alot of bikes. Saw some cool one-off stuff and a few choppers and bobbers that where very inspiring. However there where a few cafe racer styles that really caught my attention. Really want to put one of those together.

However this bike was too dang cool to pass up...

you have to love that springer front end...

YOU HAVE TO...

Get your hands on the DVD from the Fifth Service...thats all I have to say!

Had a TON of fun...

Chayse and I left on Thursday to head to La Crosse WI. 45 minutes into the trip it starts raining and it rained the whole way down...the awesome part is Chayse did not complain at all! She is the best!!

Thursday night we camped and had a great time hanging out with the other riders and with each other. Friday we went fishing, watched a movie (Kung Fu Panda) hung out at the campground and had some fun. We did get to have a bonfire at the campsite (chayse's first) so we grilled some marshmellows and the hit the hay.

Saturday it was my goal to go for a ride with the crew and make sure we had a room for the evening for a change of pace. She figured out that the hotel had a pool and that was the end of my dream of going for a ride...i did have fun swimming i will have to admit. We went to a bike show and got to see a ton of awesome bikes.

Sunday morning we got up and made the ride home...I love spending time with my kidos (really missed my wife..alot) and all I could think about was what will Colton and I be able to do?




and one bad bike...the dude that did the mods was one cool cat!

Totally Excited!

The Skooch (Chayse my oldest and only daughter) get to go on a bike trip! Woohoo for us...we leave in a few hours and will be back on Sunday or Saturday (depending on how she feels). Camping is the order of the day...sorry really hate staying in hotels...with some fishing, playing around and yes some riding!

Should be fun...see ya in a few days!

The Rest of The List....

9 - SAFE HAVENS
A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.

10 - TURD BURGLAR
Someone who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a poop at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.

11 - CAMO-COUGH
A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.

12 - ASTAIRE
A subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd Burglars that you are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear an Astaire; leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.

13 - WATERMELON
A poop that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.

14 - HAVANAOMELET
A case of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough with an Astaire.

15 - AUNT LINDA
A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An Aunt Linda makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to poop when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as the other bathroom attendees.

I really hope i have not offended anyone...if I have I sure am sorry. But hey God likes a good joke...I mean come on he made me!




and you!

Saw This Movie...

All i can say is support this movie...if it is not in your area you can get it there. I will admit I thought the movie was a little long but a very, very, very good message!

Wow what a thought.

Pro 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go [and in keeping with his individual gift or bent], and when he is old he will not depart from it. [Eph. 6:4; II Tim. 3:15.]

The idea of working with your kid and not frustrating them...what a novel concept! Sorry i was reading this morning (yes on the throne) and this verse really hit me. But mainly this part [and in keeping with his individual gift or bent]...now I am trying to figure exactly what that would look like? I have an idea...but give me some more.

More on How to Poop at Work...

6 - WALK OF SHAME

Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH.

7 - OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER

A colleague who poops at work and is damn proud of it. You will often see an out Of The Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the Out Of The Closet Pooper before entering the bathroom.

8 - THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (P.F.N)

A group of co-workers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of Out Of The Closet Poopers, and identify SAFE HAVENS.

Complete

Opened the bulletin for this weekend and saw this scripture then got a daily devotional email from Joseph Prince and...well...lets just say it went off in me!

Col 2:10 And ye are complete in him, which is the head of all principality and power:

Wow if this don’t say a lot to you then I don’t know what will…you are complete in Him! Not half or a 3rd but full and complete. Not waiting to be complete…but complete now...in Him...not later but NOW! Not someday in the by and by or when you get your confession right or get the sin from your life…but NOW are YOU COMPLETE in HIM!

Complete:

1 a: having all necessary parts, elements, or steps (a complete diet)

2: brought to an end : concluded (a complete period of time)

3: highly proficient (a complete artist)

4 a: fully carried out : thorough (a complete renovation) b: total, absolute (complete silence) a football pass : legally caught

5: of insect metamorphosis : characterized by the occurrence of a pupal stage between the motile immature stages and the adult.

So what about you is complete? Anything you need…healing, peace, love, joy, life, wisdom, understanding, knowledge, mercy, hope, vision, power, strength, courage, guidance…lets just say it in one word – blessing! Realize no matter how you feel this is who you are in Him...this has been bought and paid for, for you! You don't need to get healed...you are healed because you are complete!

"I used to think that I had to ask God to make me more patient, until I realised one day that Jesus is my patience. Since then, I no longer ask God to make me wiser either, because Jesus is my wisdom. (1 Corinthians 1:30) I am not waiting to receive more healing because Jesus is my complete healing at this moment. And I am not yearning for peace and rest one day because Jesus is my peace and rest today. Right now, I have everything because I stand complete in Christ!" …Joseph Prince

Spend sometime meditating on this let the Holy Ghost show you how “complete” you are because you are “in Him”!

All you need to do is be in Him...Jesus said that anyone who calls on Him he will answer!

Joh 3:15 That whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have eternal life.

Act 2:21 And it shall come to pass, that whosoever shall call on the name of the Lord shall be saved.

And It Continues...

4 - JAILBREAK

When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.

5 - COURTESY FLUSH

The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poop hits the water. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.

Part 2...

2 - FLY BY

The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if hey catch you constantly going into the bathroom.

3 - ESCAPEE

A fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of embarrassment. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee. It is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.

HOW TO POOP AT WORK

Those of you who are apart of the PFN will use this as a refresher...those who are new welcome please consider this part of your schooling.

We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brewing down below. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK POOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the Survival Guide for taking a dump at work.

1 - CROP DUSTING

When farting, you walk really fast around the office so the smell is not in your area and everyone else gets a whiff but doesn't know where it came from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full fart has been expelled. Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure the smell has left your pants.

Dont worry more is to follow...get it...more to follow...hehehe!

For Me To POOOP On! or the parable of The Barren Fig Tree!

Barren fig tree

Luke 13:6-9

Luk 13:6 And He told them this parable: A certain man had a fig tree, planted in his vineyard, and he came looking for fruit on it, but did not find [any].

Luk 13:7 So he said to the vinedresser, See here! For these three years I have come looking for fruit on this fig tree and I find none. Cut it down! Why should it continue also to use up the ground [to deplete the soil, intercept the sun, and take up room]?

Luk 13:8 But he replied to him, Leave it alone, sir, [just] this one more year, till I dig around it and put manure [on the soil].

Luk 13:9 Then perhaps it will bear fruit after this; but if not, you can cut it down and out.

Vs 6 – God is looking for fruit in our lives.

Vs 7 – Mans answer to someone who is not producing fruit is to get rid of it and start over. It is the Bill Cosby idea of parenting “I will get rid of you and make another just like you!” Sometimes we even approach our selves the same way, we feel as though we are not growing enough or don’t love God enough and we think of ourselves as needing to be “cut down” because we are “Taking up room” and “why should we (it) take up the good ground from others”.

I love Gods reply to us, to the Devil (he is the one who brings those thoughts) and what God says to others!

Vs 8 – “Leave it alone” then he says “Give it more time”. You know we get frustrated and want to give up long before God ever does! But notice what he wants to do “till I dig around it and put manure [on the soil]”. I know the manure idea doesn’t sound nice but really it is a great thing. Manure is used to cause things to grow and that is what God is looking to do for you.

He wants to take the time to bring people in your life to put manure on you (LOL man I love the mental image) so that you can grow and mature! Who has God brought into your life to help you to grow, if there is no one in your life to “manure you” (no one to speak into and challenge you spiritually) then ask God to bring people, the right people to help you!

Who can you spread some manure on? LOL man I still love the mental image of this…sorry I know I am a little demented but this is what you get! It is awesome how much God cares about you and I…enough to never give up on us!

Boy Did I Have Some Fun....

Go and check this bike out!

Help I Cant Read...

I am stealing this post from someone else...Is Google Making Us Stupid?


Here is my take on it:

1. I as a Pastor rarely ever use a bible...WHAT!...yep cause all my bibles (8 different versions) are in my laptop and phone.

2. Every sermon i have ever written is in my phone and laptop.

3. ideas for sermons are in my phone and laptop.

4. notes from the last 6 years of listening to Mac, Lynne, or any other preacher are in my phone and laptop. I still have notes from the prior years laying around and have plans of scanning them into the puter!

I do all this because it makes my study time much easier...however i have found that i have a hard time reading books...i can sit down and make myself do it but i have found myself thinking "man if i just scan this thing into my computer..."

Have we all become to reliant on tech to make it thru the day?

Not to sure what to think of this...

I usually am a pretty reserved person when it comes to new stuff I tend to be of the mindset that I am going to sit back and watch it for awhile to see the fruit of it...and this is one of those "not to sure things".

Three Gooooooobers

My three goobers...wow do i love them. I have a love hate relationship with going to open houses and here is why. I love seeing all the kidos that Kelly and I have known thru church all grown up and ready to move on in life. We talk about how we remember them being gangly and awkward in Jr. High and are now having children of there own!

Then it hits me that these three will be doing the same thing at some point in the mere future.

I am excited for the three of them and yet sad for me...cause i will miss them the way they are right now.

Ohhh well!